Time for a Change

Take Shape for Life

Well, I finally decided to get back on the diet that helped me lose 99.6 lbs back in 2009.

Back then I gave up on myself and gained it all back in less than a year.

I know what you’re thinking:  WHAT HAPPENED!?  I’ve spent the last 5-ish years thinking about that.  A lot happened.  But here’s the thing:  none of it matters now.  Not a single thing that happened then has to keep me from losing the weight again now.

Take Shape for Life works.  I was able to follow the plan for 9 months without even thinking about cheating.  I can’t even express how good I was feeling, how healthy and energetic.  The food is great and there are lots of sweet choices, including a slew of yummy chocolate options.  And if I had stuck with it, and followed the simple transition plan, I would most likely still be thin.

But I am a self-sabotaging emotional eater.  So when things started going downhill in my life, I started to have what AA members know as “stinkin thinkin” – letting those negative thoughts and emotions take control.  That whole, “screw it, what’s the point” attitude that can make you lose your mind completely.  I went there.  And I stayed there for a long time.

Part of me has always believed that I don’t deserve “the good things in life” (whatever those are).  There’s a little voice in the back of my brain that reminds me that I’m just a welfare brat who used food stamps to buy penny candy so there would be change to buy her mother’s cigarettes.  That’s a whole other long sad sob story I won’t get into right now.  Suffice it to say I have some pretty negative self talk going on most of the time.  Until recently (which is also a story I’m not telling right now).

Over the last 5 years, my thoughts on losing weight have gravitated toward that of failure.  Yes, I can lose weight.  I’ve done it a number of times over my lifetime.  Hell, I can vary more than 5 lbs in a single day up or down.  But I always gain it back and then some.  And that pattern, that mindset, made me think of myself as a failure.

But in the last couple of weeks I’ve come to realize something else:  I’ve learned things from each of those experiences.  I can apply them to moving forward.  I know what to look out for.  All I had to do was look back to see where I went wrong.  After all, hindsight really is 20/20.

And yes, I may fail again.  And I’ll learn something else about myself.  And I’ll pick myself up and try again.  And I won’t wait 5 years this time.

I’ve come a long way from that little girl.  And she does deserve better.  We all do.

 

If you’re interested in the diet I’m on, please contact my free health coach, Laurie Fields:  http://getfitadventure.tsfl.com/

Tell her I sent you!

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