Beginning a New Journey


So… I haven’t really talked about this, but I’m fat.  Ok, not fat, morbidly obese.  I’m 5’6 ½” and 301.4 lbs.  My bmi is 47.9 (normal bmi = 18.5–24.9).  I am 165 lbs over my optimal weight range (~135 lbs).  That’s a whole other overweight me!

So far I have no fat-related medical problems except one:  high blood pressure.  Now, I’ve been fat for about 30 years (I’m 52) and only got high blood pressure when I discovered I had endometrial cancer 2 years ago, which has nothing to do with being fat (but that’s another story).  So don’t try to blame the bp on my fat – it is 100% stress related.  The fat doesn’t help, though.

My Halloween costume from last year. I'm still that size.
My Halloween costume from last year. I’m still that size.

I sit on my fat ass all day at work.  I come home and sit on my fat ass all evening.  Then I go to bed.   The most exercise I get most days is walking in to my desk from the parking lot, about 1000 feet.  I have to rest if I walk any more than that.  I can’t stand still for more than about a minute, or walk for more than about 10 minutes, without my back hurting.

I eat a big bowl of cereal for breakfast.  Half the time I don’t eat lunch at all; I may just snack on something unhealthy instead.  I come home and eat a giant plate full, sometimes 2, of whatever Matt has cooked for dinner, which is usually delicious.  I snack before bedtime, something unhealthy mostly.

All that changes today.  Today I’m beginning a new journey.

I’ve tried to lose weight in the past, just like every other fat person on the planet.  I’ve even had great success and lost 99.6 lbs in 2009.  I gained it all back and more in 2010.  And I’ve had small successes when I’ve tried a diet for several months, lost 20-50 lbs, and gained it all back.  I’ve also had great failures when I would try a diet for a couple weeks (or days) and give up with no success at all.  Just like every other fat person on the planet.

Now, I want to explain something else about the morbidly obese:  it’s not just about diet and exercise, as most non-obese people including doctors believe, it’s also about mental health.  Obesity is a symptom of something deeper, not the disease.  I can change my behavior around food and movement, but if I don’t look at the deeper issues that cause my eating and laziness, I won’t be able to keep weight off.  That’s reality.

When I’m happy and my life is going well I lose weight organically without having to think about it.  It’s happened so many times I can’t even count.  Twice I’ve lost all the weight without even trying.  And as soon as my life takes a downward spiral I just gain it all right back and more.  Every time.  Like clockwork.

This time I’m working on that as well.  With this blog.  I will record my thoughts and mental struggles as well as my diet/exercise story.  Writing is cathartic.  I will use this outlet to tell my story.  All of it.  My hope is that by dealing with all the baggage I can once-and-for-all become the happy, healthy person I was meant to be.

What will I be doing, exactly?  I’m glad you asked!

The Metabolism Miracle by Diane Kress, RD, CDE
The Metabolism Miracle by Diane Kress, RD, CDE

I am beginning The Metabolism Miracle* by Diane Kress, RD, CDE.  I’m not going to describe the entire program in detail; you’ll have to buy the book if you want that.  But I will share my experience as I walk through this 3 step program.

Step 1 is an 8 week cleansing of sorts.  Step 2 is retraining your pancreas and liver to process carbs properly, which lasts at least 8 weeks until you have reached your goal weight.  Step 3 is everything after that.

The basic premise is that there is a Metabolism B (aka metabolic syndrome, syndrome X, insulin resistance) and that it hijacks your body’s ability to process carbs properly.  The book is a prescription for correcting the imbalances created by unchecked Metabolism B.

Just because you’re obese doesn’t mean you have Metabolism B; you could have it and not even be overweight.  There are specific symptoms which the book details.  If you want to see if you have those symptoms, Ms. Kress has a website here: (which consolidates some of the symptoms into 12 instead of the 18 in the book).  Of the 18 symptoms, I have all but 2.

I will also start on light exercise.  Today.  I’m starting today.

I’ll let you know how it goes!  Let me know in the comments if you have experience with, or thoughts about, this program.


(thanks to my dear friend Lisa, who loaned me the book)

*I am in no way affiliated with The Metabolism Miracle.

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One thought on “Beginning a New Journey”

  1. You go girl! I’m pulling for you –

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